That'll void your warranty - Your worst or most painful "fixes"

Re: That'll void your warranty - Your worst or most painful "fixes"

...that's probably the best I've heard so far. So unbelievable yet entirely plausible.

Just recently I received a call from another state. Poor guy couldn't kick over his CA77.

He had spent hundreds to have the clutch....repaired somehow. He couldn't describe what was done because the Harley chimp that did the work couldn't describe what he'd done. He just kept repeating the word "clutch" and babbling on with excuses. The Harley guy would avoid him. In fact, the owner would wait at his house and the Harley guy would open the throttle as he rode by and just blow him off.

Somehow he finally got it back and paid for the repairs in full, even though the guy couldn't show that anything had actually been fixed. He says he put in new clutch plates and when the owner got the bike back, the clutch side cover was off and some pieces weren't assembled.

He said once you try to kick it, you'd get a really loud clunk and it would jam up. But, you could turn the wheel in neutral. So I told him to put a spanner on the rotor and try to turn the crank and sure enough it always jammed in the same two spots.

So you know what is next. One valve won't seat and the piston has a nice bruise in it. Bent valve.

How do you possibly disrupt the timing by working on the bottom end??? It seems impossible because it is! Keep Harley chimps away from refined and simplified machinery because the only thing they know how to do is blow a whole motor apart just to replace a stator. I'm still pissed off when I think about it. I can't help but want to track this guy down and put small metal rubbish into his spark plug holes, or silica in his oil tank. Fuck that guy. I have a short shit list, and this guy managed to score high.

Re: That'll void your warranty - Your worst or most painful "fixes"

teazer said:

In fact, most people are probably not qualified to even operate a motorcycle or a PC.

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Have you ever test-ridden somebody's bike that made your pants a bit heavier when it was over?

I can't comprehend how these people are alive!

No front brake.
No clutch cylinder fluid
NO AIR IN THE TYRES! ZERO
Chains so tight that they rattle, snap and crunch under you
Front suspension so weak the bike nearly tilts on braking
Horn button or kill switch located away from grips
Bolts not tightened. I once removed a swing arm nut with no tools.

The lack of air in tyres I still don't understand. I roll a bike around a few inches and the owner is shocked when I tell them the tyre is low, then I'm shocked when the gauge doesn't even read.

Can somebody explain to me how you ride without a clutch lever? I mean, how do you come to a stop? Is it acceptable to just not have a clutch because you don't want to add fluid?

"But it doesn't matter, because I'm Homer Simpson!" -Frank Grime's last words

Re: That'll void your warranty - Your worst or most painful "fixes"

I'm pretty sure I got a winner.

Re: That'll void your warranty - Your worst or most painful "fixes"



And a dime for extra sealing sealability



No need to do anything with those extra high-beam leads.



BONUS Steel braided line with aftermarket zip tie!!!

Bar clamp

Re: That'll void your warranty - Your worst or most painful "fixes"

...you win this round, but if you think about it, did you really win anything?

This isn't mine, but I found it on another site and had to share hahaha
Some ppl...

Re: That'll void your warranty - Your worst or most painful "fixes"

Hm, if you look really closely at it, you'll just end up hurting even more.

I think this was a solution to a non-problem. The sprocket is supposed to have play to align itself.

There is a logical story behind that fix. Sprocket shaft broke in the middle of a long ride. Temp fix to get them to their destination. Replaced the sprocket and sprocket shaft after the ride.

Re: That'll void your warranty - Your worst or most painful "fixes"

The idea that that sprocket got them anywhere really makes me look at life in a whole new way.

Reference the bike in the top "before" photo



Hose clamps used to hold parts to the bike
Duct tape used to hold parts to the bike
U-bots used to hold parts to the bike
Parts welded to the bike
All wiring done in red wire
Kick start lever welded to it's shaft
24" ratchet extension welded to shifter shaft
Approx. 3 feet of rod used for rear brake actuation
One rectangular headlight, one round
Front fender hose-clamped to "active" struts of springer fork
Blue RTV all throughout engine
Many SAE and metric screws & bolts cross-threaded into Whitworth threaded holes
Numerous mounting holes drilled into frame
Crimped front downtubes from clamped on cruiser pegs or crash bars
Front brake plate spinning freely on front axle (no front brake)
Rear brake heavily oiled from various oil leaks spewing all over rear half of bike
One stainless steel pipe, one "not so stainless"

So, did I win?

grandpaul said:

Reference the bike in the top "before" photo

Hose clamps used to hold parts to the bike
Duct tape used to hold parts to the bike
U-bots used to hold parts to the bike
Parts welded to the bike
All wiring done in red wire
Kick start lever welded to it's shaft
24" ratchet extension welded to shifter shaft
Approx. 3 feet of rod used for rear brake actuation
One rectangular headlight, one round
Front fender hose-clamped to "active" struts of springer fork
Blue RTV all throughout engine
Many SAE and metric screws & bolts cross-threaded into Whitworth threaded holes
Numerous mounting holes drilled into frame
Crimped front downtubes from clamped on cruiser pegs or crash bars
Front brake plate spinning freely on front axle (no front brake)
Rear brake heavily oiled from various oil leaks spewing all over rear half of bike
One stainless steel pipe, one "not so stainless"

So, did I win?

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Yes. Very ambitious build and possibly a candidate for a new from the grave thread?

Tune-A-Fish said:

...possibly a candidate for a new 'from the grave' thread?

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All that remains from the chopper was the engine/tranny, frame, and rear hub.

I've got a few other very striking "before & after" composites, but none with THIS level of bodgery.

Re: That'll void your warranty - Your worst or most painful "fixes"

Put that in a modern art exhibit. Incorporate a wooden oar and feces and you could make millions.

grandpaul said:

All that remains from the chopper was the engine/tranny, frame, and rear hub.

I've got a few other very striking "before & after" composites, but none with THIS level of bodgery.

Click to expand...

I started with a similar tragedy: Not a restoration though, turned it into a hardtail.

Tune-A-Fish said:

I started with a similar tragedy: Not a restoration though, turned it into a hardtail.

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Maybe the picture hides alot of flaws, but i can dig that bike for what it is =)

Front end was all wrong shook like hell and steering head was raked by a weld shop that had a torch and some 7013 rod or something so the welds looked like a bird shit from the rafters on it... had to cut that off and rebuild it entirely, the po put hwy pegs on and crimped the frame with exhaust clamps had to cut that out and re weld in new... so its now a town bike build. Took it to my sons for paint and finish work: he works on the railroad so slow going, but should be done this spring.

Re: That'll void your warranty - Your worst or most painful "fixes"

Wow, a craigslist special has been brought back!

I hope you saved those maroon megaphones. I'll buy them if you still have them (really). On a big British twin, they sound pretty nice when it comes on the cam.

grandpaul said:

I hope you saved those maroon megaphones. I'll buy them if you still have them (really). On a big British twin, they sound pretty nice when it comes on the cam.

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Still have em... was gonna make lamps... haha... no really, you can have them for shipping cost so they live again, I wont use them any time soon.