Here it is then, a little early as I hope to be in Sunny Saxony first 2 weeks of April.
Beachcomber’s Tales from the Day – March 2012
“Father’s Easy Two [ Norton ES2 ], the Tight Leathers, and the Ride from Hell”.
This Tale [ 1964 ? ] involves my late Father’s ES2 Norton – basically a cooking version of Norton’s single range, albeit in a Featherbed frame. This model the Fire-Breathing :
500cc version as opposed to the more mundane 350cc . Primarily these 2 were the commuters in the range offering simple maintenance over the complication of the twin Dominators [ ? ], and reasonable performance ??? with good economy. They were also exceedingly cheap back in the early - mid sixties, and I’d bought this one for £20 to use as a base for a Triton that a pal had asked me to build for him. To put the £20 into perspective, I'd just laid out £5.00 for a genuine Manx 5 gallon Alloy tank.
I used it for a while as my own Tribsa was off the road having new Borrani’s fitted up. When my Father saw the Norton, he wanted it for his daily commute to the Ford experimental base where he was working. He offered me what I’d paid for it + his ratty T100. Oh well, lose the rolling chassis for the Triton, but gain and engine and gearbox ! Anyway deal done on the basis I could carry on using the Easy Two until my Tribsa was back up and running.
That didn’t work out too well, as Father’s car blew a head gasket and he needed the Norton straight away. The Tribsa wheels were causing a bit of a headache, as I was having the front rim built on to a newly acquired Goldie front hub. I got a call to say the brake drum was out of true and needed skimming, which meant getting oversize brake shoes, which delayed the build.
So ……….temporarily bikeless I was using my trusty JU250 race transporter van to get around, and of course missing the weekly burn-ups and visits to the Caffs. I made the mistake of deciding to go up to the Woodlands one eveningcto see who was around, as I was getting severe withdrawal symptoms ! Worked out quite well actually as 2 guys had broken down [ head gasket and fried clutch ] and I ended up doing the AA [ that’s Automobile Association – NOT Alcoholics Anonymous BTW ! ] run to get the bikes back to their respective homes and earning myself a few quid into the bargain. All the usual crew were there and it transpired they were organizing a run to Brands Hatch at the weekend where, amongst others there was a National sidecar race. The reason we were all keen to go was that there was an International sidecar race at Mallory the following weekend and all the Continental Circus was in town for a warm up race – Duebel, Camathias, Scheidegger, etc.,etc. – HAD to go.
Ah problem, no bike…………and by that time I refused to go pillion to any of my nutty mates [ those that HAD dual seats ] and there was no way I was going in the van.
A call to Father proved a winner, he wasn’t using the Easy Two at the weekend AND needed to borrow my van to move some garden rubbish – deal done.
I collected the Norton on the Friday night and on the ride back thought - I can’t be seen on this by my mates ……….Two hours later the Manx 5 gallon tank, seat and rearsets I’d bought for the Triton were on together with a Goldie silencer !
I stopped short of fitting the clip-ons – only because I hadn’t yet bought a spare set of headlamp brackets, and didn’t fancy cannibalising my Tribsa for one day’s riding. A pal had some “Vincent straights” – basically as described, so I borrowed those and 20 minutes later the bars were swapped over. For a 3 hour makeover, it didn’t look too bad ! That said, I didn’t have time or the inclination to attempt to do anything to improve the “performance” - 80mph flat out and zero to sixty – eventually. 8)
Definitely all show and no go, but at least it would look the part in the car park. To add to the visual [ ie showing off ] I decided to wear the brand new Rivetts racing leathers I’d just bought myself. Early – mid sixties was still the domain of traditional Black leathers, but Rivetts had come up with a “stunning range” of coloured leathers – Red or Blue ! And they were actually cheaper because nobody wanted to be the first to go away from Black and they weren’t selling well. I made the mistake of breathing in when my measurements were taken, and in an attempt to get away from the “just shit myself” baggy arse look, made all the relevant measurements – er……… a little tight. When they arrived [ mail order ], the ONLY way I could get them on was by wearing nothing underneath but a pair of pants [ shorts ? ] OK for sprint racing [ which is what I was then doing ], but you’d definitely end up singing falsetto if you attempted a 10 lap circuit race ! :'(
So that’s how I set out to meet the lads on Sunday morning for the run to Brands. Actually, that was our “local” and thanks to the Rotherhithe Tunnel under the Thames that brought the circuit within a 30 minute ride, rather than having to go further up the Thames for the next crossing some 90 minutes away through East End London traffic.
I’d also neglected to think about money, or more precisely where to put it ! Eventually I put it in the side panel with the tool roll.
The week prior had been quite warm and dry and I was looking forward to the ride – and having the piss taken out of me by my riding mates –3 x Bonnies, 2 x Goldies, a Triton, CSR Matchless and 2 x Super Rockets.
After the inevitable piss taking we decided to set off. “Yea we’ll all have a slow ride down so we don’t lose you TJ “ ….That lasted all of 10 minutes before I got the V’s and they all cleared off into the distance. When I finally arrived some 10 minutes after they’d all had their first fag and cuppa, I again had the piss royally taken.
We settled down in the Grandstands to watch the racing, all eyes on the “racer bloke” in the leathers. That was some consolation for the ribbing I’d taken from my mates. However, my smugness soon faded when the sun went in and the temperature dropped to the point where I was shivering uncontrollably with the cold. Then joy of joys, just as the last race ended the heavens opened up into a monumental hailstorm. By this time I was so cold and miserable – I just wanted to get home.
Actually we’d all arranged to go back to a pal’s house as he’d got some Isle of Man TT cine film footage to show us from his recent visit. The roads were virtually awash, and the route back to our village was all narrow lanes for the first 16 miles or so. We all set off – all the lads naturally had their waterproofs to throw over their leather jackets and jeans – I had bugger all !
This time I didn’t hang around or actually care if I fell off or not – I just wanted to get back in the warm and dry. Now one thing where the Easy Two DID score was the handling – the legendary Featherbed chassis and I’d fitted Avon GP tyres. It’s often said in racing that rain is a great leveler of performance differences, and I took full advantage of that. It was probably one of my personal outstanding rides in the wet [ which I hated ] and this time the tables were reversed and I arrived back at my pal’s some 15 minutes before the crew. In fact his Mother was so worried by my early arrival [ she knew the story about my humble bike AND the piss taking ] she was convinced there’d been a crash !
My mates were equally convinced that as they hadn’t passed me, I was holed up in a caff - probably Johnson’s half way down “Death Hill” outside the circuit.
When they eventually arrived and saw the Norton parked outside they were convinced I’d found some short cut to arrive back before them. In fact I’d had a nice warm shower and was sitting with my pal’s dressing gown on when they came in. For some months after that the story of “TJ on the Easy Two in the Rain” was the talk of the lay-bye !
The Norton ? That was restored to it’s BOF specs and returned to Father who had NO idea what his bike had been through ! Some 9 months later I swapped it back again for an Enfield Meteor Minor [ 500cc ] that had a “bathtub” rear enclosure similar to some of the Triumphs of the era. The Meteor had come as a freebie when I bought the ex. Bob Mac Connie.
A week later a 500 Dommie came into my possession, and that was sooooo sweet that I smoked it around for a couple of months before tearing it apart for the Triton conversion.
The racing? Camathias came out the victor with Duebel in second – Pip Harris and Chris Vincent were the best of the Brit Charioteers. In the solo races there was some guy called Minter virtually lapping everyone by the end of the race – aptly named “The King of Brands” .
Father's ES2 was Dark Green.
